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The Wager Wire: Week 9

In which the banker gets revenge and laughs all the way to...well, you know.

Remember the halcyon days of (checks notes) last week, when our punters made out like bandits? Yeah, that didn’t last.

Every single one of our team lost money last week, and in fact there were only three measly parlay legs that came through - none of which, predictably, came close to paying off.

But the advantage of everyone losing is that everyone lost and no one opened up a bigger lead on anyone else. Although Cody may want to consider taking out a loan at this point.

So, here’s how things look this week! All bets are from Bovada and were accurate at the time the bet was placed. Also, since there are only four games on the schedule tonight, our degenerates can make a bet on tomorrow’s games as well, although everyone has bet on tonight’s Hurricanes/Oilers matchup.

The Wager Wire Bank

Bettor Last week profit/loss Current balance
Bettor Last week profit/loss Current balance
Brian -$25.00 -$17.23
Zeke -$60.00 $126.85
Kevin -$33.00 $139.67
Cody -$50.00 $61.88
Andrew -$15.00 $122.10
Jake -$20.00 $4.71

Banker’s Bonus!

Jaccob Slavin has made a name for himself as being the Kryptonite to Connor McDavid. If the Canes can keep McDavid off the score sheet tonight, the banker will double every Hurricanes bet next week!

This Week’s Bets


  • Parlay: Canes to win and over 5.5 goals. I have a bad feeling about tonight, because the Canes tend to lay eggs as a rule when they return home from a long road trip. But what the heck, I’m sure there will be goals (there were 11 in Edmonton a month ago!) and I’ll take a leap of faith on the Canes to win. $15 pays $26.70.
  • Parlay: Leafs -1.5, Jets straight up, Flames +1.5. $15 pays $62.30.


  • Canes to win -1.5: +145 odds, $10 pays $14.50.
  • Parlay: Canes, Sabres, Wild, Bruins to win. $5 pays $22.20.


  • Gotta make up some ground. Canes to win -1.5. +135 odds, $15 pays $20.25.
  • Parlay: Bruins -1.5, Wild -1.5, neither game goes to OT. $20 pays $117.64.


  • Canes/Oilers under 5.5: +110 odds, $10 pays $11.
  • Flames to win: +110 odds, $10 pays $11.
  • Parlay: Lightning -1.5, Jets -1.5. $5 pays $19.20.


  • Parlay: Canes -1.5 and Sabres -1.5. $20 pays $112.
  • Bruins to win -2.5: +245 odds, $15 pays $36.75.